control freak

It's official. I'm finally admitting to being a control freak to the whole world but more importantly, to myself. I came to this understanding while in Colorado for a wedding. I love these two so much and I'm so happy that I got to spend the day with them! [Warning: if you were there, you might not want to read the following!]

However, the days after were not such a good time for me. Having the back-drop of CO helped. But, where no cell service meets 15+ people meets doing things together results in complete stress. I like to work on a time schedule and when others do not abide by that time scheduled, I'm not necessary the most fun to be around. Actually, I'm down-right rude, mean, and disrespectful. When we decide on leaving at 1:30, it means leaving at 1:30, not 1:33! Meeting at 9:00, means we are meeting at 9:00, not 9:20. I understand some amount of flexibility is needed in life. I'm Gumby when it comes to changing plans and doing something different. Just tell me; call me. When you are working on someone else's schedule (i.e. a wedding), you can't just show up late (well, maybe you can but you shouldn't). I guess the point in writing this entry is to say it's not you, it's me. I know that. But, please understand when I'm not happy when you show-up late. Please understand when I want you to commit to something. Please understand when I'm not enjoying myself after something above has happened.

I know I should have separated myself from the group this weekend but love being around others. I enjoy those conversations that just come up. We all have weaknesses that Christ magically works through us (Thankfully!). Just understand this is mine. Yours may be having no sense of organization. I try to be flexible with you, now will you please try to be flexible with me? This is a two way street and I'm not the only one who always has to compromise my personality to be apart of a group.